You know those lightbulb moments when, like a bolt outta nowhere, you suddenly slap your forehead and realize something utterly amazing.
Well this wasn’t like that.
Rather, this was a slo-mo, blurry edged, fuzzy thing dawning on me kind of realization. But it did make me slap by forehead.
For years now, I’ve been giving my kids multi-request instructions. And, by giving, I mean yelling across the house. For example:
“G, please go upstairs and turn the light off in your room, pick up the PJs you left strewn on the floor and put them in the hamper. And don’t forget to bring your library book downstairs.”
“T, it’s time to put your shoes on and then brush your teeth. Don’t forget to also brush your hair. Then get your coat, hat and mittens on. Oh and is your lunchbox in your backpack?”
or variations thereof.
This happens on a daily basis. Often many times.
You are nodding, I see. You do this too. And, like me, you wonder why all components of such requests never ever ever ever get completed?
The slow-loading realization that finally slapped me around the face like a cold, wet fish was that, after the first few words of the request, kids universally hear the following:
“Wah wah wah wah wah wah wah wah wah wah wah…….”
It’s nothing personal (I hope.) I realized they can only process one request at a time! All this time, I’ve been projecting my multi-tasking-ninjaness onto these little creatures whose brains simply cannot deal with that much information at once, let alone remember the correct sequence.
This finally dawned on me when my six year-old said, just like Otto in the movie A Fish Called Wanda, but cuter:
“What was the middle thing?”
Henceforth, I must remember to break down these requests into bite-sized chunks and deliver them eyeball-to-eyeball, rather than shriek them from one end of the house to the other. We’ll see how that goes during the usual morning mayhem.